.Have I Ever.

Seriously? Its been so long. I've got tons of stuff to put up here, I'm just scared. Lol. I don't see that changing any time soon, but you can have this.

Have I Ever?

I've come to the sad conclusion that
I'm just in love with love.
I see it in places it isn't,
In things that he said, and things that he didn't.
It's not that I'm desperate,
It's just that I'm lonely.
And is it so bad
To just wish there was someone to hold me?
See where I come from,
Altruism is scarce.
If you're male, and we're speaking,
Then there's probably something there.

I guess I was too young when I learned
How it lessened the burn
To pretend it was love, and not lust.
That that brightened his eyes,
Brought wetness to my thighs,
It was easy
To think was just between us.
But now that I'm older
The world, once on fire, has grown colder
And I stare at stars, so afraid
Everything that I've felt, so called love
Will all melt away, and be boiled down,
Till it blends in so well with the pain.
Have I ever known anything real
Or have I been made so scared to feel
That I'm numb when it comes?
Have I ever known anything true
Or have I been made so scared of you
That I'll run from love?


Written: 02.07.09